We were about to make a very symbolic purchase.....no, not the pizza.....although I'm sure we ate at that Pizza Hut that day. You see, we'd been married three years and had recently reunited and recommitted to one another after a 9 month separation and intense individual and couple's counseling. Because of the 'transitional' nature of our first three years, we'd lived in a combined total of 5 rental situations up to this point and so we'd just rented furniture along the way, as well.
Today we were going to make our first major furniture purchase: a table. I'm sure we just thought we were buying a 'place to eat meals' as an alternative to sitting on the floor or on the couch in front of the TV. Yeah, wouldn't that be what you'd be thinking? How many of us actually get philosophical when buying furniture, really?
So we purchased an unfinished, round table with a substantial claw-footed base. Should have picked up the sandpaper and stain on the way home....but the call of the pizza was probably way too compelling.
We threw a bed sheet over it and there it remained, unstained, for a year. It was only the 'threat' of having friends over for Thanksgiving dinner that year that motivated us to uncover this beauty and finish the project.
That table has been with us 40 years, has traveled many miles, graced the kitchens of our 6 abodes during that time. The chairs that have surrounded it have come and gone....but that table, well, it's 'family'.
In Shauna Niequist's book Bread and Wine, she describes 'the table' in a way that has come to have a lot of meaning to us:
"The table is the life raft, the center point,
the home base of who we are together." (p.30)
And when you think about all the things that happen 'around the table' you can see why that metaphor is apropos. Our family archive of photographs, which documents our journey, features countless pictures in which this table is displaying birthday cakes, Thanksgiving and Christmas gathering dinners, and science fair projects. You can almost mark Laura's, Allyson's and Brian's ages by the heights they were when photographed standing near the table. One picture, a favorite of mine, captures our Easter egg-dying experience around that table when all three of our darlin's had chickenpox.
Good talks....hard talks were had at this table. Tears were shed, problems were hashed out. Feelings were hurt at this table and forgiveness was asked and given and reconciliation occurred around this table. Sometimes ones left this table in anger, slamming footsteps echoing into another room. But they always came back and come back still. Like you'd return to a life raft, considering the alternative.
It was around this table that Rob and I would work out the family budget, on green bar ledger paper, before the advent of computers. Some of the budgets had more 'red' than 'black', but never once did we miss a meal or a house payment. God's Grace and His Provision has been, and continues to be, abundant in this place.
During the season of 2002-2004, our table was the site of mapping out wedding budgets and the 'staging area' for the mailing of invitations, reception table centerpieces and the wrapping of gifts as our family grew in size and love as first, Allyson, then Brian followed by Laura each joined their lives to another.
We've gathered in their homes, around their 'life rafts', and we sense the same quality of 'welcome' and 'you're family' that we would hope anyone feels when they come into our home. That's a good thing.
These days our 'life raft' is most often the setting for a simple meal for two, as the afternoon sun fills the room. It serves as a comfortable gathering place for the pre-marital counseling and marriage mentoring that we do.......over 100 couples have joined us here over the past 10 years. It still gets to be the 'staging area' when a long-anticipated road trip or camping weekend is in sight, as well. And frequently it's graced with the sticky fingerprints of small, eager hands......bits of play-doh, crayons, paper airplanes, and magical drawings......delightful and precious reminders that our family, and the experiences around our 'life raft' continue to grow in size and the capacity to give and receive love.
I'd love to know what story this table would tell, if it could.
I want to remember all the details. I've tried to imagine it
here, but I'm sure I fall short.
Where's your 'life raft'? Can you hear the story it's trying to tell?
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